In just about two hours, I’ll be 29. This is the same age Mom had me. Actually, today (Sept. 24) is her birthday. Yep, she was in labor on her 29th birthday, and a day after, I was born. Come to think of it–her birthday falls on the 24th, mine’s on the 25th, and Raviv’s birthday is on the 26th…December nga lang. But still, amazing coincidence. 🙂
Earlier this evening, I attended our church’s Leaders’ Group meeting. The warm-up question was, “How would you describe this season in your life?” Almost without batting an eyelash, I immediately answered–I said that “I was very, very, very happy.” If I were asked this question years ago, I wouldn’t have said that. As I was explaining why I was very, very, very happy, I suddenly realized that my being ecstatic was surprising, as not much has changed in the past years: I’m still married to the same man, I still have the same work, and I still live in the same house. In fact, the only major change is the presence of destructive, black eye-inducing whirlwind of a toddler named Raviv.
Raviv has brought so much joy into my and Randy’s lives. It’s amazing how a “Nanay!” can bring as much joy as buying a new designer handbag can; how a trip to the supermarket to buy Raviv’s snack is as much fun as shopping for new shoes; and how a simple trip to our neighborhood pet shop to look at fish makes me as excited as though it were a trip to Europe.
But I guess the most important thing Raviv has done for me is that my son brought me closer to my Father. Our Father. The encephalocele scare we had when Raviv was just a month old solidified my relationship with God. Whenever I had doubts, I would recall the feeling of being cradled by God and finding solace in His presence, and how our ardent prayers were answered. This led to my regularly attending my Bible studies, and being entrusted to lead my group.
At first, the thought of leading my group scared me. After all, I was still very far from being the epitome of a God-fearing, Christian woman. Much less being perfect. But my spiritual “mother”, Rhia Frio, often tells me that I really am never going to be perfect, and that I don’t have to wear long skirts and ill-fitting blouses just to qualify to lead my group. I can still salivate over designer bags and look fabulous (harhar) and lead a group, as long as my heart is for serving God.
Leading my group has done so much for me, including, finally, appreciating things. I guess that is the reason I am able to say that I’m very, very, very happy despite being in a situation I’ve been in for the past several years. Finally, I’ve come to accept that a situation always has two facets: positive and negative. Although I’ve heard this so many times in the past, it is only now that I’m cradled in God’s arms that it has finally sunk into my thick skull. Now, I see that the glass is often half full.
On my 29th birthday, I am still a work in progress, far from being perfect. I would still stumble to be humbled, and people who know me will still question the authenticity of my being a Christian, but they can’t question it because it is God’s will.
And oh yeah, I am also happy because I’ll be watching The Phantom of the Opera on my birthday–front row, bay-beh! But the best part is that my musical-hating husband is going to sit through it to be with me…best gift ever!
Tell me what you think!
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