As I am typing now, it’s only about 30 minutes to go before Mother’s Day. So to all the moms out there, happy mother’s day to us! Never thought this’d be a big deal for me but I am giddy about it for some reason. I guess that “some reason” is this squirming sleeping baby boy beside me.
Anyway, I salute us moms for being, well, moms. We’ve seen a bazillion quotes depicting how much of a Herculean task being a mom is and all. I’ve met so many amazing moms both personally and in the blogosphere, but two moms amaze me so much that I have to feature them here. They are real people, and I will write about them not because they’re selling something and I want to use the “good mom” angle and then I will slyly add, “…and oh, she also owns this blah-blah-blah company”, sabay link ng online shop. Ahahaha! Basta sobrang from the heart ito. 🙂
First mom I’d feature is my spiritual mother, Rhia Frio. Here she is with hubby Art Frio ladies and gentlemen:
Saan lumabas ang mga bata? Saan?!?
Would you believe she’s past 40 (sorry Rhia!!!), and that four boys came out of that body?!? And that two of her boys have already graduated from UP, one is a student leader in the College of St. Benilde, and the youngest has just graduated from grade school? I love her but I hate her for maintaining that figure! To think she’s not even exercising regularly. And as far as I know, she’s not dieting. Grrr!
So aside from her figure, why else do I love her (no I don’t hate you, silly! :))? Because her husband and kids are crazy about her. Sobra. And because she’s crazy about serving God. Sobra rin.
The Kikay Christian
With her red-kung-red lipstick, dangling earrings and ever-present statement sandals, her physical appearance does not really epitomize the Christian marm-ish look we expect. But I am in awe of how much time she devotes to the ministry, to her “contacts”, and how passionate she is about giving glory to God. And her craziness about God is also the reason why her boys are also crazy about her.
The Good Wife
When I asked Rhia how come her husband of almost 25 years is still crazy about her (you should see them together! PBB teens lagi ang peg!), she said “It is because of the Lord’s love for me (and for Art)! Totoo yan!” Rhia confided that months before she became a Christian, she and hubby were not exactly in good terms. But when she became a Christian, her life did a 180-degree turn! She went from being a bar regular and a yosi-girl to being a Bible-reading, talk-about-God’s grace woman!
She avers that “God gave me the wisdom what a real Christian wife is supposed to be (learned so much from Proverbs 31) and what a Christian mother should be! It is no secret, it has been written since time immemorial — I just needed to be led by God’s Holy Spirit to read God written Word and apply it! He gives us the grace to be able to. Left on my own, I cannot…it is a tall order!”
Raising four son…yep, four sons!
I also had to ask Rhia how she was able to raise four God-fearing and responsible sons. I repeat, FOUR SONS. Rhia says that her husband’s full support had been vital–she couldn’t have possibly done it without his help. She says that, “During our boys’ growing years, Art and I were both working full time. Sometimes we had Yaya, there were times we do not have one! And these were the most challenging times — we had to find ways how to make everything work! We wake up very very early to prepare everything, and when we come home from work we had to pick up the kids, cook dinner, do the chores, wash the kids before going to bed, wash the clothes (thank God for washing machines) and cook in advance for breakfast and dinner (we just reheat everything). We also had to enlist the help and support of my Mama, or my brothers and sister or my in-laws. There was even a time, in my desperation (bec I had a training then – as in ako ang Trainer – that I cannot be absent from work), I had to leave Ogie and Juni with our neighbor (I was pregnant with Bem)! Those were really such trying times, pag naalala ko yun natatawa ako na naiiyak ako!”
Her first two boys by the way are some sort of local celebrities, being band members. And as band members, they have to have a “cool” image, right? But Ogie and Juni always invite their folks to their gigs. Rhia even drives them to auditions and all. Nope, they’re not the least ashamed of their mom tagging along! How cool is that, huh?
Rhia is also proud to say that her sons are obedient kids. The secret? They “discipled” the kids while they were growing up. Yup, “disciple”. What is the exactly? She and hubby made it known to the kids that they love them thoroughly, yet they also had to let them know who’s the boss. They also made it known to the kids their most ardent wish: for them to grow up God-fearing, and that loving God is of utmost importance. She also cites this book as the best parenting guide ever: the Bible.
Rhia’s message to other moms
Just LOVE your children! EXPRESS your love the “loving” way so they won’t be “exasperated.” Do not be harsh to your children. Yes you can discipline them, in fact we are called to discipline our children. But never ne harsh to them. Just love them! And teach the to love the Lord. Being God-FEARING means God-LOVING. Ephesians 6:4 says. “Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.” Of course, this applies to mothers too.
Some practical ways of showing that you love them is to BE THERE FOR THEM. Watch plays with them, or better yet watch their school play and be the best and number one fan of your child! Go with them during their yearly field trips. Zoos may bore you, but it’s an adventure for them! And the stories they’re gonna share with you afterwards will make you say to yourself: “I’m glad I went with him.” The butterfly kisses and appreciation hugs from your child is way way and far more better than that pat on the back by your boss or that appreciation award you are gonna get from your company. It lasts longer! Be friends with their friends. Understand what they are playing — at least just understand, if you can’t play the game. Have fun with them.
And an additional advice on discipline?
Say YES if you need to. Say NO if you need to. Explain why. Don’t just say yes or no and leave them hanging without an explanation. Sometimes, saying a stern NO and telling them “because I love you” is enough. Say “I love you” as often as you can! Say “I love you too” even if they don’t say I love you. It’s more fun for me and my children that way. I get to teach them that saying “I love you” is not an awkward thing. Saying SORRY if you need to is as important as saying I love you. You teach them that asking forgiveness whenever they need to is natural.
Right on target practical tips, eh? But Rhia, I think you forgot something that you actually do: That you stay pretty!
I think it’s important to stay pretty for your kids–what kid does not want to introduce a pretty mom to their friends and teachers, right? 😉
While Rhia’s supermom powers may not be Kapuso Mo Jessica Soho or Rated K-worthy, I still admire her greatly. Though she isn’t a showbiz celebrity, a politician or a big-time entrepreneur who gushes how she juggles mommyhood and career, I’d still love to be like her. Because for a mom and wife, what else is better than having God-fearing children and husband who are all crazy about you. 🙂
(All photos lifted from Rhia Frio’s Facebook account)
Next: Dr. Wen Raymundo
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