Just when I thought naubusan na si Raviv ng mga kalokohan, or that nothing he says will shock me anymore, here I am again with a collection of the crazy things my little tyke said. Here are some funny things my kid said in the past weeks.
Setting: Nanggigil si Randy sa ka-cute-an ng anak niya. Kinagat ang paa ng bagets.
Tatay Randy: I will eat you Raviv, you’re so cute!
Raviv: ‘Wag mo ako kainin Tatay—people ako! Hindi kinakain ang people! Hindi ako yummy! ‘Yung carrots ang kainin mo!
Oo nga naman Tatay! Unless you’re a “carnival”, ika nga ni Melanie Marquez. Mwehehehe!
Setting: Raviv spat out his food after chewing. I got angry.
Nanay Dew: Raviv, bad ka! Papaluin na kita!
Knowing I will keep my word, Raviv went to me scared. He hugged me, and then he begged…
Raviv: Nanay, ‘wag mong paluin si Peter Parker. ‘Wag Nanay, ‘wag paluin si Peter Parker”.
Hindi ko napalo. Kayo ba, papaluin n’yo ba ang superhero?!? I just buried my face into his back and laughed. ♡♥♡
Setting: I was talking to my colleague, (itago na lang natin sa pangalang…) Dela Renta in front of Raviv who was playing. “Dela Renta” is gay (yet his parents do not know it yet, thus the codename). Then all of a sudden Raviv said:
Raviv: Nanay, si Tito *Dela Renta* and si Tito Pao, same sila?
Nagkatinginan kami ni *Dela Renta*, because Pao was also gay.
Nanay Dew: Yes baby, they’re the same. What are they, boy or girl?
Raviv thought hard (unusual, because he usually answers quickly; he already knows how to distinguish a boy from a girl), and then said…
Raviv: Boy na girl!
At nagkatinginan kami ni *Dela Renta*! Amazing!!!
Setting: Raviv has just taken a bath.
Yaya Isay: Kuya (referring to Raviv), ano’ng isusuot mo?
Nyeh! Supalpal si Yaya!
Setting: Brownout. Yaya Isay led Raviv into our bedroom with a candle. Fearing Raviv would be his usual likot self if the light were kept on, I snuffed the flame by blowing the candle.
Raviv: Nanay! ‘Wag blow ‘yung candle! Wag!
Nanay Dew: But we need to sleep baby. That’s why Nanay blew the candle!
Raviv: No! Hindi dapat blow ‘yung candle! Wala namang cake!
Oo nga naman!
Nakiki-birthday lagi si Raviv!
Conversation 6…seryoso na ‘to!
Eto, hindi lang pala kalokohan ang alam ng anak ko. May serious side din. Natameme tuloy kami ni Randy…
Setting: We (Familia Ladaga) were in the car, talking happily. For some reason, humirit ng ganito ang Raviv….
Raviv: Nanay, ‘wag mong agaw bathroom si Tatay.
Nanay Dew: Ha?
Raviv: ‘Wag mong agaw ng bathroom si Tatay. At ‘wag kayong fight! Ayokong fight kayo ni Tatay.
For about a few seconds, natameme kami ni Randy…our last argument was about the schedule of use of bathroom! But how did Raviv know?!? He was at school when we raised voices at each other! But then my suspicions about his sensitivity to our bickering were confirmed. See, about a month ago when, again, we were arguing in front of Raviv, Raviv kept on interrupting us. He would say things, ask things and won’t stop until we talk to him, ganun. Time came when Randy and I kept quiet. And then I started my motor mouth again. Raviv put his hand on my mouth and said, “’Wag na kayo usap!” Randy said Raviv probably just wanted the attention to himself, but I really suspected he was preventing our argument. And then there’s that incident when Randy was tickling me and won’t stop. I cried for Raviv (“Raviv, help me, help me!!!”) At first he just looked at us, not knowing what to do. And then I pretended to be hurt and asked him to help me. Raviv hurled a pillow onto Randy’s face. It was quite hard, and Randy yelped. Randy asked Raviv, “Why did you hurt me Raviv?” He said, “Protect ko si Nanay”, but tears were welling in his eyes and he turned away from us and buried his face. Nadurog ang puso namin! We knew he was so torn, as he both loved us fiercely. I realized that it really is difficult for a kid to take sides when his parents are not okay. 🙁
Missed Conversations with Raviv Part 1? HERE it is!
Tell me what you think!
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