On Wednesday evening, one of my closest friends called. Was I at home daw ba and was I free. I said yes, I was just at home and no, I was not busy. She said our other friend was also free, so they’re both dropping by our house for a super impromptu meet-up. It was perfect because it was Game 7 between San Miguel and Alaska, and Randy was looking forward to it (a first for him to get excited over PBA, as he was almost exclusively watching only NBA). Which means I will be invisible to him for 2-3 hours.
My friend said she was craving for instant pancit canton, and that’s what she wants for dinner.
Not long after, they both arrived and we cooked pancit canton with boiled eggs while chatting about anything and everything. I brought out a wine bottle that I chilled, and so we were sipping wine in between forkfuls of instant pancit canton. After wolfing down the 4 packs of instant pancit canton we cooked, I asked them whether they wanted ice cream, and they said yes.
Wine, instant pancit canton and ice cream. It was a weird combination, but no one complained. I realized that was just like the three of us. We three have very different personalities. As in. But put us all together in one sitting and you won’t crave for anything else. We’ve been friends for so long, and we kept that friendship despite leading very different lives and having no “friendship rules”. Ever since we got together, we have never had any stupid dress codes, juvenile friendship mantras, pabebe sisterhood pacts or any rule for that matter. Although honestly, I wanted these pa-cute “friendship rules” sana, mala-Mean Girls or Sisterhood of the Travelling Pants.
But now I’m glad we just allowed each other to blossom into what we are now. No one was scared that since she did this, wore this or liked this person, she will be condemned and judged. So when it doesn’t work out, no one is shy to pour her heart out to the group, to admit that she screwed up.
That’s what I love about our friendship. No pretensions. Either together or one-by-one, we can be as masa and jologs as pancit canton; mainstream and “pop” like ice cream; and philosophical/intellectual/pa-deep like wine.
Anyway, the reason I withheld the names of my friends is because I want to chika with you the conundrum of one of them and perhaps, seek your advice. See, my friend is dating a decent man who I think is a good catch: sweet, good-looking, a gentleman, family-oriented, diligent and loves kids. What’s the caveat? My friend is more well-off than the guy. We are not being matapobre here, by the way. Read further. The guy is too much of a gentleman to let my friend foot the bill on their dates. So what’s the problem, right? Exactly what I told her. She said, “Eh teh, sa pride n’yang ‘yan, parang wala kaming patutunguhan. Nagkikita lang kami tuwing kinsenas, ‘pag kakasweldo lang!” That’s also because the guy is the breadwinner, so his salary isn’t entirely his. Yiz, that’s the problem. My friend isn’t exactly getting younger, and she wants to settle down. Pero kung tuwing kinsenas at free lunch courtesy of networking seminar lang sila magkikita, baka mauna pang ikasal si Raviv kesa kanila (knock on wood).
My friend said that their tuwing-kinsenas-lang dates is probably the reason why she isn’t into the guy that much. To my young readers, women my age get into serious relationships with a guy not just for a free dinner or movie or to get giddy or boost their self-esteem. At this point, my single friends crave for a best friend—a constant companion whom they share their innermost thoughts and feelings. And yes, eventually settling down is always within the horizon.
Hay. I know it’s difficult. Real grown-up lovelife problems. Do you think my friend must wait?
Tell me what you think!
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